Monday, August 16, 2004

Dancin' to the Max

Today, Bayside gets served, as the students dance at the command of one Casey Kasem. "Two will enter, one will leave," bellows Casey, as the ruthless Applause-O-Meter determines the fate of our heroes. Who will survive? The Spandex Twins? The Powerhouse Preppies? The Warriors? Only the Applause-O-Meter knows for sure.

Also today, Jessie is super-racist against short people, we hear some decidedly rockin' Bach, Mr. B refers to himself as the "Big Bopper" for the first time ever, and Slater just dances and smiles and dances and smiles and smiles and smiles and dances!

Today's Quote

Jessie: "Zack, you don't know what it's like to be the freak. Taller than all the boys. The jokes, the looks, the whispers.

Wait till Showgirls comes out Ms. Spannow - you ain't seen jokes, looks and whispers.

Saved by the Bell Quote Hall of Fame

Casey Kasem's flubbing of this line turns a commonplace lemon into the sweetest lemonade:

Casey Kasem: C'mon everybody! Let's do...the...(looks down, flustered) ... the sprain!

Most Implausible Moment

When the school band rocks their socks off to the tunes of the Big Bach-er, the sound of a mighty saxophone takes center stage.

One problem: There is no saxophone in the room.

"Fat People Are Not People Too" Watch

Mr. Margolies: "Poor Mrs. Wickham slipped and got her head stuck in a tuba."

Slater: "Maybe they should get Fat Tommy to blow her out."

Mr. Margolies: "Good idea."

The incessant mocking of the overweight is not just rampant in the halls of Bayside, it is ENCOURAGED!

No comments: