Thursday, August 26, 2004

Close Encounters of the Nerd Kind

Is it just me or are these first season episodes unecessarily outlandish? I mean, so far, we've had brainwashing, a remarkably effective acne cream that (except for an extremly short-lived side effect) would revolutionize dermatology forever, a fully functional example of artificial intelligence, and now, today, we get a radio station coming in through Screech's fillings and UFO's? Let's rein it in here, folks - I'm starting to appreciate the later episodes, where the most outlandish thing that happens at Bayside is a visit from Brandon Tartikoff.

So, today, OOPS broke the video camera that took Bayside two years to get (they should stop wasting all ther money on professionally printed plastic heart and such). Wait, $1500 in the National Babbler for an alien picture? Weren't we shooting an alien movie? Isn't Screech a weirdo? The reporter is really a Lieutenant in the United States Air Force looking into UFO's! Time to break out all the Screech masks that are really Larry from the Three Stooges masks (no wonder this school can't afford a new video camera if they're issuing every student a Screech/Larry mask)!

Also today, Jessie dresses like a Mexican lady from the Three Amigos and calls herself Maria Tortilla and says things like, "Buenos Nachos." Plus Screech does one of those wonderful "takes-off-mask-to-show real-human-face-then-takes-off real-human-face-as-if-it-were-a-mask-to-reveal-what-really-is-a-mask" takes that are a hallmark of great comedy. And, on second thought, those Larry masks look more like Steven Wright than Screech or Larry.

Todays Quote

Screech: Zack, do they wear underwear in heaven?

Most Implausible Moment

Zack's lie to Mr. Belding:

Zack: "You heard of Batman? Well Jessie played Batmamasita."

That doesn't even sort of make sense and is the dumbest lie ever I think.

Also, that the whole radio and Air Force thing. That was pretty implausible.

PUNS! Watch

Mr. Belding's Secretary (where is her office, exactly): "Mr. Belding, please report to the gym. The water polo team has a horse in the pool again."

Mr. Belding: "Kids love horseplay! HA-ha!"

"Remeber the 90's?!" Watch

Jessie (as teacher in the movie): "After the battle, one of the greatest speeches in American History was made by President Pee Wee Herman."

Phunny Phony Ad Watch

The best radio ad ever (from Screech's mouth): "For country eatin' there's no beatin' 'Billy Joe Bob's House O' Possum!'"

I can think of about three different reasons why that is so awesome (hint: one of them is because of PUNS).

"How'd This Get Past Standards?" Watch

Screech: "It's kind of neat except when a big guy held me up to his ear and tried to shove his cassette in my mouth."

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