Tuesday, August 17, 2004

Cream for a Day

Ah, the acne cream episode. Zit Away, Beldasil, Obviously Whiped Cream and toothpaste: call it by any name and it is still is wonder and a blessing and a wonder.

Today, a chemistry experiment blows up in Screech's face (literally! Hahahaha!) which is an experience I'm sure every one who's been in a sitcom can relate to. Does it burn his flesh? Give him super powers? Nope, it demolishes blemishes in a matter of hours (the underlying science behind such a physiological miracle is, as I'm sure you've assumed, explained ad naseum - if ad nauseum means not at all). Unintential side effect - maroon blotchy rashes. Oh, also comedy!

Also today, we find out that Bayside hasn't beaten Valley at football in 23 years and that is probably because their star quarterback is a freshman and Slater. Also, CRATERFACE COBURN! That kid should have been a regular.

Zack: "Give 'em some I.D., Charles."

Craterface: "(Loud "Revenge of the Nerds"-style laugh.)"


Today's Quote

Jessie (giving Valley's cheer): We won I'm sure we won get re-al like forever is the deal.

Man, somebody wrote that.

Saved by the Bell Quote of the Day Hall of Fame

After a truly spectacular rap by Kelly, Lisa, and Jessie (so far, the whole gang has rapped at least once, with Slater going twice with today's human beat-box debacle), the famed Bayside school cheer. Sing along, kids:

Everybody: Bee-buh-bee-buh-buh-beat! Bee-buh-bee-buh-buh-beat! Go Bayside!!!!!!!

Most Implausible Moment

Lisa (to Kelly): "How is anyone going to find out you wear a retainer?"

Nerd: "Wanna join our Retainer Club?!"

C'mon. A Retainer Club?


"Remember the 90's?!" Watch

Screech: "My worst nightmare has come true!"

Zack: "You found out ALF* was a puppet?"

Screech: "He is?"

Screech: "It could do wonders for Gorbachev*!"

Zack: "Sort of like an Acne Glasnost."

And, the pièce de résistance:

Craterface: "Jason Bateman's not on the $10 bill!"

* What is with all the ALF and Gorbachev's head stuff? Seriously?


When was Jason Bateman President?

1 comment:

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