Tuesday, July 11, 2006

The Lisa Card

Whew. For the first ten minutes or so of this episode, I was a little worried because it was all "Lisa spent too much money on her dad's credit card" and "wah wah wah" and "this is just like a normal bad sitcom" and "where is the weird Saved by the Bell?" There was even a totally wasted dream sequence where Lisa's dad was the devil and Screech was the Grim Reaper and Lisa dressed like a punk and I know I know that sounds crazy, but it wasn't. Trust me.

But then, whoa boy, we come back from commercial and get this totally insane Miss Wentworth class about animals doing it (you'll remember her as the teacher who lied about subliminal advertising and who really should be fired dudes), Slater talking to Mr Belding about wanting to be a transvestite, Mr Belding talking about going to prom with his sister, Mr Belding talking about making it with a Vietnamese girl when he fighting was in 'Nam (WHAT), Lisa as a waitress and they play the tape real fast because Slater used to be a busboy in Bolivia (HUH?), and this really long bit where Lisa has a thought bubble over head and it basically replays the entire episode for some reason. Guys, Saved by the Bell is really a pretty weird show.

Also in this episode, Mr B does the worst Elvis impression ever, the twins buy cowboy boots, and nerds reiterate their fondness for retainers and Ovaltine.

Today's Quote

Mr Belding: After the war, I was dateless again. That Viet Cong girl dumped me.

Not really a joke, but this whole bit just blew my friggin' mind ok?

Most Implausible Moment

Jessie: "Thirty-seven dollars in tips in three hours? I can't believe it!"

Um, I can.

Miss Wentworth Should Seriously Be Fired Watch

Kelly: "You mean reproduction in the animal kingdom?"

Miss Wentworth: "I prefer to call it 'monkey business in the jungle.'"

Slater: "Yeah, how come birds aren't attracted to horses?"

Miss Wentworth: "Oh, but they are. Unfortunately, there just isn't room in the nest."

Miss Wentworth: "Today's topic: The Pond - Nature's Hot Tub."

Add to that getting the class to do impressions of frogs, insects, and birds in heat, and you've got a teacher who is seriously unstable. And, I ask this again, what the hell class does this lady teach??

How'd This Get Past Standards? Watch

It was an innuendo bonanza today, even taking out Miss Wentworth's class.

Screech (discussing a piece of Lisa's lingerie he just bought(!)): It will lie next to me in my bed.

Lisa: I thought you slept with your dog?

Screech: He won't mind!


Mr Belding: "I'll never forget her first words to me - don't swallow your tongue!"


Customer: "This isn't what I ordered - you were supposed to toast my buns!"


Lisa: "Daddy, I was kissed by nerds!"


Lisa: "Daddy, punish me!"

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